I Want To Be Alive With You ... By Toko-Pa Turner

October 09, 2014

This poem has touched me so deeply in the last week, I wanted to share it with you.

 

I Want to be Alive with You

by Toko-Pa Turner

 
I want to be guided by older-ups. 
I want babies to be born where old people die. 
I want to be sandwiched in the middle of a messy togetherness.
I want to be warned before I do something stupid. 
I want to be forgiven when I do it anyway. 
I want wisdom to be tapped out on my eardrums and not Googled. 
I want transitions to be recognized by fire.
I want gifts to be educed from children. 
And teenagers and adults and I want to mean something to my community. 
I want to get drunk on substance morning and night.
I want to hear your dreams. 
I want to raise a revolution for gentleness. 
I want to call out the bullshit on consensus reality. 
I want to get rich so I can billboard the highways with validations.
I don't want to be another faker. 
I don't want to show you my good side and hide my humanity.  
I don't want to dole you out my Self in digestible status-chunks. 
I want to challenge you in long, drawn-out rituals and still find you interested.
I want to feed you seventeen course meals made with spices I crushed.  
I want to recite you circular poems, each beginning cutting a deeper grasp. 
I want to make you feel something, even if it's awkward. 
I want to sing you songs which are ancient and new.
I want to carve stories in trees with tools my elders fashioned. 
I want to keep sharpening them. 
I want to find places we've never been. 
And then, I want to return there, but backwards.
I want to shuffle up words so we don't sleep through them. 
I want to learn things and then be splashed into never forgetting. 
I want to make you feel seen. 
I want to hold your pounding heart in my gentlest of hands. 
I want to make your thing feel like my thing.
I don't want to miss a moment. 
I want to dig at the bottom and find it false. 
I want to turn up unknown depths. 
I want to stand in this hurricane and sing the sweetest, 
most naked song you can bear.
I want to be alive with you.
.
.
.
.
  
Love is here for you,
The door is open.
xo





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